The paradox of our time

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints.

We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time.

We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.

We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life.

We’ve added years to life not life to years.

We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor.

We conquered outer space but not inner space.

We’ve done larger things, but not better things.

We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.

We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.

We write more, but learn less.

We plan more, but accomplish less.

We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait.

We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.

These are the days of two incomes but more divorces, fancier houses, but broken homes.

These are days of quicker trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.

It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom.

A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete…

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember; say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember; to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn’t cost a cent.

Remember; to say, “I love you” to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember; to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Simple arguments- for existence of the Almighty

The most simple arguments of ancients on this topics are still valid, in spite of all the

complexity of the modern science.

An old woman was spinning yarn. Someone asked her why she did believe in God. She

stopped her hand and the spindle stopped. She said: “You see, a simple spindle needs a

hand to make it revolve. Can you think that this sun, this moon, these stars, all this world

moves without any guiding hand?”

Hadhrat Imam `Ali ibn Abi Talib (a.s) was asked for a proof of the existence of the Almighty

Designer. He replied: “The faeces of camel and of donkey lead one to conclude that such

animals have passed that way. The traces of human feet indicate a man’s trek. Do not this

magnificent universe, with all its sublimity and this lowly point (the earth) with all its solidity

point to the existence of the Almighty Allah, the Sublime and the Omniscient?”

Once Abu Shakir ad-Dayasani (an atheist) came to Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq (a.s.) and asked

him to guide him to the recognition of “my Supreme Lord.” The Imam asked him to take

his seat. There arrived a small child with an egg in his hand. The Imam, taking the egg

from him, addressed Abu Shakir ad-Dayasani:

“Here is a mysterious fortress enclosed within a hard shell, underneath which is a fine

wrapping which covers molten silver (the albumen of the egg) and some molten gold (the

yellow yolk). The molten gold does not get alloyed with the molten silver, nor does the

molten silver get mixed with the molten gold. (Yet both are semifluid and they should have

mixed together on jerking.) They retain their separate states. No artist comes out of it to

say that he has made any changes therein, nor does any vitiating agent enter it to tell of

any vitiation therein. Nor is it known whether it is designed to produce a male or a female.

Pea-birds of florid colouration issue therefrom. Do you think it has a Designer (the

Omniscient Creator)? Who has painted all this inside it? And how did the chick come

about? Who designed all these variegated hues, the feathers, the limbs, the paintings, the

feet, the beak, the wings, the eyes, the ears, the nose, the bowels, the crop, the joints,

etc., etc. seeing that no one entered it? “

Abu Shakir, according to the narration, was absorbed in his thoughts for sometime with his

head downcast and then suddenly proclaimed, “I bear witness that there is no god but

Allah, the one without peer, and I bear witness that Muhammad (s.a.w.w) is His servant

and prophet, and that you are Imam and Proof of Allah for His creation, and I turn away

from my erstwhile attitude.”

UNITY VS. IDOL-WORSHIP

Then the Holy Prophet asked the idol-worshippers why they worshipped the idols instead of the one Almighty God.

They said: “We seek to be nearer to God through these idols.”

The Holy Prophet: “Do these idols hear? Are they pious and obedient servants of God?

How can you seek nearness to God through them ? ”

Idol-worshippers: “No. They do not hear.”

Holy Prophet: “And the fact is that you have carved these idols by your own hands. So, if these had ability to worship, it was incumbent upon them to worship you (because you are their creator) not that you should worship them.

“Moreover, God has never allowed you to worship idols (so how can you be nearer to God through these idols, without any authority from God?).”

On hearing this argument, the idol-worshippers split into three groups:-

One group said: “These are the images of those persons in whom God was incarnated.

Thus we worship God by worshipping the images of those persons who were incarnation of God. ”

The Holy Prophet said:-

1. ” Your belief that God was incarnated in anybody is absolutely wrong because you have made the Creator like His creatures. Don’t you see that God cannot be incarnated in anything unless that thing surrounds God. (But how can anything surround God?)

2. “Also what will be the difference between God and other things which are found in a body (like colour, taste, smell, hardness or softness, heaviness or lightness). All these things are found in other things, and have no independent existence. Is God also like this?

3. “Lastly, when you attribute to God a quality (incarnation) which is the quality of a transient (of a thing which was created after non-existence), then why not believe that all qualities of a transient are found in Him. I mean, you must also believe that God changes and deteriorates and dies, because the body of His supposed incarnation changes and deteriorates and dies. It is impossible for the content not to change with the changes of the receptacle!

“All these considerations prove that it is impossible for God to be incarnated in any body.

“And when incarnation is wrong, there remains no basis for your belief that God was incarnated in some of His creatures and that these idols are the image of such persons.”

The second group said that those idols were the images of those of past generations who were very obedient to God. “We carved their images and worship them with a view to glorify God through their worship.”

The Holy Prophet asked them: “Pray tell me what kind of worship have you saved for Almighty God, when you are worshipping these images by prostrating before them, praying to them, and putting your head before them?

“Don’t you know that it is the right of God that He should not be thought equal to His servant? If you honour a King in the same way as you honour his servant, will not it be an insult to the King? ”

Idol-worshippers: “Yes. It is true.”

The Holy Prophet: “Then, don’t you realize that by worshipping the images of the creatures, you are insulting the Creator ? ”

The last group said: “God created Adam and ordered the angels to prostrate before him.

We are more deserving to prostrate before Adam (because we are his children). As Adam is not alive today, we have carved his image to prostrate before it and to seek nearness to God through that worship.”

The Holy Prophet told them: “Accepted that God ordered the angels to prostrate before Adam. But has He ordered you to prostrate before the image of Adam? Adam and his image are not one and same thing. How are you sure that God is not displeased with your prostration before Adam’s image ?

“Look at it in this way. If a man allows you to enter his house one day, do you have any right to enter that house next day? Or to enter his other house the same day ?

“If a man gives you a gift of one of his clothes, or one of his horses, are you justified in taking it?”

Idol-worshippers: “Yes, we will take it.”

The Holy Prophet: “If you don’t accept that cloth or horse, do you halve any right to take his other cloth or horse without his permission ? ”

Idol-worshippers: “No. Because he had gifted the first cloth or horse, but not the other.”

The Holy Prophet: “Who has more right that his property should not be used without his permission: God or His creatures?”

Idol-worshippers: “God has more right that His property should not be infringed upon.”

The Holy Prophet: “Then why are you contravening this principle? When and where has God allowed you to worship the idols?”

After some consideration, all of them became Muslim.

BELIEF IN GOD: A Natural Instinct

BELIEF in God is as natural as any instinct can be. An atheist asked Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq

how could he convince him about the existence of God. Coming to know that the man had

gone several times on sea voyages, Imam asked him “Have you ever been caught in a

fierce storm in middle of nowhere, your rudder gone, your sails torn away, trying

desperately to keep your boat afloat?” The answer was `Yes’. Then Imam asked: “And

sometimes perhaps even that leaking boat went down leaving you exhausted and helpless

on the mercy of raging waves?” The answer was again `Yes’.

Then Imam asked: “Was not there, in all that black despair, a glimmer of hope in your

heart that some unnamed and unknown power could still save you?” When he agreed,

Imam said: “That power is God.”

That atheist was intelligent. He knew the truth when he saw it.

Cycle of Evil

There was once a king who was so cruel and unjust that his subjects yearned for his death or dethronement.
However, one day he surprised them all by announcing that he had decided to turn over a new leaf.
“No more cruelty, no more injustice,” he promised, and he was as good as his word. He became known as the ‘Gentle Monarch’.
Months after his transformation one of his ministers plucked up enough courage to ask him what had brought about his change of heart, and the king answered:
“As I was galloping through my forests I caught sight of a fox being chased by a hound. The fox escaped into his hole but not before the hound had bitten into its leg and lamed it for life. Later I rode into a village and saw the same hound there. It was barking at a man. Even as I watched, the man picked up a huge stone and flung it at the dog, breaking its leg. The man had not gone far when he was kicked by a horse. His knee was shattered and he fell to the ground, disabled for life. The horse began to run but it fell into a hole and broke its leg. Reflecting on all that had happened, I thought: ‘Evil begets evil. If I continue in my evil ways, I will surely be overtaken by evil’. So I decided to change”.
The minister went away convinced that the time was ripe to overthrow the king and seize the throne. Immersed in thought, he did not see the steps in front of him and fell, breaking his neck.

Simple Lessons In Life

Woke up this morning…. lying in bed, I was asking myself….
what are the secrets of success in life?
I found the answers right there, in my very room
The fan said : be cool.
The roof said : aim high.
The window said : see the world.
The clock said : every minute is precious.
The mirror said : reflect before you act.
The calendar said : be uptodate.
The door said : push hard for your goals.

Have A Great Day !

Islamic Etiquette of Gatherings, Greeting and speaking

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: ‘Walking through a group of sitting people is foolish; the believer must sit wherever he finds a place.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 72]

قال أبو عبد الله (ع) : لاينبغي للمؤمن أن يجلس إلاّ حيث ينتهي به الجلوس ، فإنّ تخطي أعناق الرجال سخافة . {البحار ج72}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “The Prophet used to sit mainly facing the Qiblah (Kiblah) (in the direction of Holy Mecca).” [Reference: Al-Wasa’il, from the chapter of guidelinesImam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “The Prophet used to sit mainly facing the Qiblah (Kiblah) (in the direction of Holy Mecca).” [Reference: Al-Wasa’il, from the chapter of guidelines of companions] of companions]

عن الصادق (ع) قال : كان رسول الله (ص) أكثر ما يجلس تجاه القبلة . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “It is not permissible for a man to sit facing Qiblah with his legs drawn up and wrapped in his garment.” [Reference: al-Kafee, Vol.2]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : لايجوز للرّجل أن يحتبي مقابل الكعبة .
[ الإحتباء : هو أن يضّم الانسان ساقيه الى بطنه بثوب يجمعهما به مع ظهره .]
{الكافي ج2}

The Prophet prohibited that a man is told to give up his seat for another. About that he-s.a.w- said, “But rather, make room and sit comfortably.” It is also reported that the prophet had cursed someone who sits in the middle of a circle (of people) and prohibited that a man sits in between two people, except with their permission.

نهى النبي (ص) عن أن يقام الرجل عن مجلسه ويجلس فيه آخر . قال صلّى الله عليه وآله : ولكن تفسّحوا وتوسعّوا وروي أنّ النبي (ص) لعن من جلس وسط الحلقة ، ونهى أن يجلس الرجل بين الرجلين إلاّ بإذنهما . {البحار ج72}

It was reported that the Prophet used to sit in one of three positions: Squatting, kneeling and bending one leg and stretching the other over it. He was never seen sitting cross-legged.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

روي أن النبي (ص) كان يجلس ثلاثا” : القرفصاء وهو أن يقيم ساقيه ويستقبلها بيديه ويشدّ يده في ذراعه ، وكان يجثو على ركبتيه ، وكان يثني رجلا” واحدة ويبسط عليها الأخرى ، ولم يرَ (ص) متربعا” قط . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Three people don’t have to start the greeting: Someone who is walking with a funeral procession, someone on his way to the mosque to perform Friday Prayer, and in the bathroom.”

عن الصادق (ع) قال : ثلاثة لايسلّمون : الماشي مع جنازة ، والماشي الى الجمعة ، وفي بيت حمام . {البحار ج73 }

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “When any of you enters his house, let him say a greeting; this way he is causing the blessings and the angels to go down to it.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إذا دخل أحدكم بيته فليسلّم فإنّه ينزله البركة ، وتؤنسه الملائكة . {البحار ج73}

Al-Sabaty asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) about the way women are supposed to salute people when they visit them. He (a.s) said: “The woman should say; ‘With you is peace’, and the men should say; ‘Peace be with you’.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

سأل الساباطيّ أبا عبد الله (ع) عن النساء كيف يسلّمن إذا دخلن على القوم ؟.. قال المرأة تقول ” عليكم السلام ” ، والرجل يقول ” السلام عليكم ” {البحار ج73}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “The young shall greet the old, the passer-by shall greet the seated and the small group shall greet the large group.” [Reference: al-Kafee, Vol.2]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : يسلّم الصغير على الكبير ، والمارّ على القاعد ، والقليل على الكثير . {الكافي ج2}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “The riding shall greet the walking; and if one person from the group returns the greeting, the rest don’t have to.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن رسول الله (ص) قال : ليسلّم الراكب على الماشي .. وإذا سلّم من القوم واحد أجزأ عنهم . {البحار ج73}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Asking permission to enter is to be repeated three times. The first is to let them hear, the second is for them to take caution and the third is for them to permit entry if they wish; if they don’t, then the visitor must go back.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : الإستئذان ثلاثة .. أولّهنّ يسمعون ، والثانية يحذرون ، والثالثة إن شاؤوا أذنوا ، وإن شاؤوا لم يفعلوا فيرجع المستأذن . {البحار ج73}

Imam al-Baqir (a.s) said: “When two believers hiding from each other because of a quarrel meet, they should shake hands.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي جعفر ( ع) قال : ينبغي للمؤمنين إذا توارى أحدهما عن صاحبه بشجرة ثمّ التقيا .. أن يتصافحا . {البحار ج73}

Imam al-Baqir (a.s) said: “When two people shake hands, the reward of the one who holds on to the hand shake is greater than that of the one who let go.” [Reference: al-Kafee, Vol.2]

عن الباقر (ع) قال : إذا صافح الرجل صاحبه .. فالذي يلزم التصافح أعظم أجرا” من الذي يدع . {الكافي ج2}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Shake each other’s hands for it eliminates ill will.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : تصافحوا فإنها تذهب بالسخيمة .
[ السخيمة : الضغينة ، والحقد والموجدة في النفس ] {البحار ج73}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “The Messenger-s.a.w- never shook hands with anyone and withdrew his hand first.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : ما صافح رسول الله (ص) رجلاً قطّ فنزع يده ..حتّى يكون هو الذي ينزع يده منه . {البحار ج73}

Imam Áli (a.s) said: “Shake hands with, and smile and show joy to your fellow Moslems when you meet them; this way your sins will be abolished before you disperse.”

قال أمير المؤمنين (ع) : إذا لقيتم إخوانكم فتصافحوا وأظهروا لهم البشاشة والبشر ، تتفرقوا وما عليكم من الأوزار قد ذهب .

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “No man’s head or hand should be kissed save that of the Messenger of Allah-s.a.w- or someone who represent him.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : لايقبل رأس أحد ولايده .. إلاّ رسول الله (ص) أو من أريد به رسول الله (ص) . {البحار ج73}

Imam Áli (a.s) said: “ It is acceptable to kiss the kinsman. The brother (or the fellow Moslem) is kissed on the cheek and the
Imam is kissed between his eyes.” [Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي الحسن (ع) قال : من قبّل للرحم ذا قرابة فليس عليه شيء ، وقبلة الأخ على الخد ، وقبلة الإمام بين عينيه . {البحار ج73}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “No one must be kissed in the mouth save the wife and the young child.”
[Reference: al-Bihar, Vol. 73]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : ليس القبلة على الفم ، إلاّ للزوجة والولد الصغير . {البحار ج73}

According to Ahmad binMohammad binAbi-Baseer: “I heard Imam al-Rida -a.s- say: “Yawning is attributed to Satan and sneezing is attributed to Almighty Allah.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أحمد بن محمد بن أبي نصر قال : سمعت الرضا (ع) يقول : التثاؤب من الشيطان ، والعطسة من الله عز وجل .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

According to Salih binAbi-Hammad: “I asked Imam al-Rida -a.s- about the reason behind thanking Allah for the sneeze. He said: “ Sometimes man forgets Allah’s blessings regarding his health and the soundness of his body parts. So, Allah would command the breeze to pass through his body and get out from his nose. Then, man would thank Allah and that would be a compensation for his forgetfulness.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن صالح بن أبي حمّاد قال : سألت العالم (ع) عن العطسة وماالعلّة في حمد الله عليها ؟.. فقال : إن لله نعماء على عبده في صحة بدنه وسلامة جوارحه ، وأن العبد ينسى ذكر الله عز وجل على ذلك ، وإذا نسى أمرالله الريح فتجاز في بدنه ثمّ يخرجها من أنفه ، فيحمد الله على ذلك فيكون حمده على ذلك شكراً لما نسي .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Thank Allah in secret if you sneeze in the toilet; and the one who sneezes is safe from dying for seven days.” [Al-Bihar, Vol.73: p.53]

عن الصادق (ع) قال : إذا عطس في الخلاء أحدكم .. فليحمد الله في نفسه ، وصاحب العطسة يأمن الموت سبعة أيام . {البحار ج 73 : ص 53}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “When someone is saying something and somebody sneezes, this means that he is saying the truth.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إذا كان الرجل يتحدث بحديث فعطس عاطس فهو شاهد حق .
الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “When someone sneezes more than three times (in a row), you must say to him, ‘may Allah cure you’ for he is ill.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال : وفي حديث آخر.. إذا زاد العاطس على ثلاثة قيل له : ” شفاك الله لأن ذلك من علّة “. {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “Do not raise your heads towards the sky when you belch or spit; and belching is a blessing so praise Allah when you belch.” [Al-Bihar, Vol.73: p.53]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إذا تجشّأ أحدكم فلا يرفع جشاءه الى السماء ولا إذا بزق ، والجشاء نعمة من الله عّز وجلّ فإذا تجشأ أحدكم فليحمد الله . {البحار ج73}

Imam Áli (a.s) said: “A believer should not spit in the direction of Qibla. And if he forgetfully does that, let him ask Allah for forgiveness.” [Al-Bihar, Vol.73]

قال أمير المؤمنين (ع) : لايتفل المؤمن في القبلة ، فإن فعل ذلك ناسياً ، فليستغفر الله عزّ وجلّ منه . {البحار ج73 }

Imam Jafer al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “If you sneeze during meditating, say ‘ِِِِِAl-hamdu-lillah’ (praise be to God).” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of prayer interruption]

عن الصادق (ع) قال : إذا عطس أحدكم في الصلاة .. فليقل “الحمد لله” . {الوسائل من أبواب قواطع الصلاة}

Isaac bi0Othman asked imam al-Sadiq (a.s) saying; “What do you say about rising in honour of someone?”
He (a.s) said: “It is reprehensible except to a scholar.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن إسحاق بن عثمان قال : قلت لأبي عبد الله (ع) : من قام من مجلسه تعظيما” لرجل ؟ .. قال : مكروه إلا لرجل في الدين . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “The visitor is entitled to walking with him for a little while when he comes in and when he goes out.” [Reference: al-Kafee, Vol.2]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إنّ من حقّ الداخل على أهل البيت أن يمشوا معه هنيئة .. إذا دخل وإذا خرج . {الكافي ج2}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “Do not refuse a hospitable reception if you are offered one, for this is what the donkey does.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إذا عرض على أحدكم الكرامة فلا يردها ، فإنما يردّ الكرامة الحمار . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

According to Abdullah bin-al-Qidah, Imam Jafer al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Two men visited Imam Ali -a.s- and he gave each one of them a cushion to sit on. One of them did, the other refused. So, Imam Áli-a.s- said: “ Sit on it for only a donkey refuses a hospitable reception!” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن عبد الله بن القداح ، عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قـال : دخل رجـلان على أمير المؤمنين (ع) .. فألقى لكل واحد منهما وسادة فقعد عليها أحدهما وأبى الآخر ، فقال أمير المؤمنين (ع) : إقعد عليها فإنه لايأبى الكرامة إلا الحمار .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “Three actions ensure a wholehearted love among fellow Moslems: Meeting one another with joy, offering a comfortable place when sitting together and calling each other by the favorite name (nickname)” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال رسول الله (ص) : ثلاث يصفين ودّ المرء لأخيه المسلم : يلقاه بالبشر إذا لقيه ، ويوسعّ له في المجلس إذا جلس إليه ، ويدعوه بأحب الأسماء إليه .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Among the recommendations by the Prophet (s.a.w) to a man who asked him for advice is this: “Meet your fellow men with a happy face.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

أتى رسول الله (ص) رجل فقال : يا رسول الله أوصني ، فكان فيما أوصاه أن قال : إلق أخاك بوجه منبسط . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Among the things that were forbidden by the Prophet (s.a.w) is that a man says to another: ‘No! By your life and by so-and-so’s life’. [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

في مناهي النبي (ص) أنه نهى أن يقول الرجل للرجل : لا وحياتك وحياة فلان . {البحار ج 72 :ص13}

According to Isaac bin-Ammar, Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “O Isaac! Blandish the hypocrite with your tongue, and sincerely love the believer; and if a Jew sits in your company, keep him good company.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن إسحاق بن عمار قال : قال الصادق (ع) : يا إسحاق .. صانع المنافق بلسانك واخلص ودّك للمؤمن ، فإن جالسك يهودي فأحسن مجالسته . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w) prohibited flattery and said: “Hush the flatterer up!” [Reference: Makarim al-Akhlaq]

نهى النبي (ص) عن المدح ، وقال : احثوا في أفواه المداحين التراب . {مكارم الاخلاق }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Three are among the noble deeds of this world and the hereafter: To forgive the one who wronged you, to maintain a close relation with someone who broke with you and to be gentle to someone who behaved foolishly towards you.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال أبو عبد الله (ع) ثلاث من مكارم الدنيا والآخرة : تعفو عمّن ظلمك ، وتصل من قطعك ، وتحلم إذا جهل عليك .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Baqir (a.s) said to one of his companions: “O, Salih! Follow the one who makes you cry but is a sincere advisor and do not follow the one who makes you laugh but is a deceiver; and you will be returned unto Allah and you will know.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال الإمام الباقر (ع) لأحد أصحابه : ياصالح إتبع من يبكيك وهو لك ناصح ، ولاتتبع من يضحكك وهو لك غاش ، وستردون على الله جميعا فتعلمون . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

According to ibn-Abbas, The Prophet (s.a.w) was asked who the best companion was. He said: “The one whose sight reminds you of Allah, whose speech increases your knowledge and whose actions interest you in the hereafter.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن ابن عباس قال : قيل يا رسول الله أي الجلساء خير ؟.. قال : من تذكّركم الله برؤيته ، ويزيد في علمكم منطقه ، ويرغبكم في الآخرة عمله . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ My most preferable friend is the one who reminds me (makes me aware of) of my shortcomings.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال الصادق (ع) : أحبّ إخواني إليّ من أهدى إليّ عيوبي .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “Keeping these people company hardens the heart: The lowly, women and the rich.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

وقال رسول الله (ص) : ثلاثة مجالستهم تميت القلب : الجلوس مع الأنذال ، والحديث مع النساء ، والجلوس مع الأغنياء .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sajjad (a.s) used to say this to his sons: “ Sit in the company of the faithful, and the knowledgeable. If you couldn’t, then loneliness is more delightful and safer; and if you insist on sitting in people’s company, then sit in the company of the honourable, for they do not behave in an obscene manner in their gatherings.” [Reference: Al-Bihar, Vol.71, pp.196]

عن علي بن الحسين (ع) أنه كان يقول لبنيه : جالسوا أهل الدين والمعرفة ، فإن لم تقدروا عليهم فالوحدة آنس وأسلم ، فإن أبيتم إلا مجالسة الناس فجالسوا أهل المروّات ، فإنهم لايرفثون في مجالسهم . {البحار ج71 :ص196}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ When two people are together, let not two of them converse together without their companion, for that would sadden and hurt him.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي عبدالله (ع) قال : إذا كان القوم ثلاثة .. فلا يتناجى منهم إثنان دون صاحبهما، فإن في ذلك ما يحزنه ويؤذيه . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

The Prophet (s.a.w0 said: “He who interrupts a fellow Moslem while he is talking as if scratched his face.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال رسول الله (ص) : من عرض لأخيه المسلم المتكلم في حديثه فكأنمّا خدش وجهه . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “No believer but has a sense of humour”. “What is it?” I said. He said: “Joking.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي عبدالله (ع) قال : مامن مؤمن إلا وفيه دعابة ، قلت : وما الدعابة ؟ .. قال : المزاح . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ A believer’s laughter is smiling.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : ضحك المؤمن تبسّم .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ If you like somebody, don’t joke or argue with him.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي عبد الله ( ع) قال : إذا أحببت رجلا .. فلا تمازحه ولا تماره . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Too much laughing hardens the heart.” He also said: “ Frequent laughing dissolves the faith the same way water dissolves salt.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : كثرة الضحك تميت القلب ، وقال : كثرة الضحك تميث الدين كما يميث الماء الملح . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Too much laughing is indecent.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال الصادق (ع) : كثرة الضحك تذهب بماء الوجه . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Boisterous laughing is devilish.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : القهقهة من الشيطان . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam Áli (a.s) said: “ Beware of (inappropriate) joking for it brings down hatred and causes resentment.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال أمير المؤمنين : إياك والمزاح فإنه يجرّ السُخيمة ويورث الضغينة ، وهو السب الأصغر . {الوسائل من احكام العشرة}

Imam al-Baqir (a.s) said: “ If you have a boisterous laugh, say this when you finish: don’t detest me O, Allah!” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن أبي جعفر (ع) قال : إذا قهقهت فقل حين تفرغ :”اللهم لاتمقتني “. {الوسائل من أبواب العشرة}

Through his father, Imam Jafer al-Sadiq (a.s) related that David (a.s) said to Solomon (a.s): “ O, my son! Beware of excessive laughing for it impoverishes (takes away the good deeds) man on doomsday.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن جعفر بن محمد ، عن أبيه أن داود (ع) قال لسليمان (ع) : يا بني إياك وكثرة الضحك .. فإن كثرة الضحك تترك الرجل فقيرا يوم القيامة . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ In the things that concern you, choose to consult with those who are God-fearing.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

قال أبو عبد الله (ع) : إستشر في أمرك الذين يخشون ربهم . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

According to Imam Áli (a.s), the Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ Do not seek a coward for advice for he makes things look harder for you; and do not ask a stingy for advice for he will fail you; and do not ask a greedy for advice for he will deck out fair the evil said. And let it be known to you that cowardice, stinginess and greediness are traits that have mistrust (in Allah) in common.” [Reference: Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of companionship]

عن علي (ع) قال : قال رسول الله (ص) : يا علي .. لاتشاورنّ جباناً فإنه يضيق عليك المخرج ، ولاتشاورنّ بخيلاً فإنه يقصر بك عن غايتك ، ولاتشاورن حريصا فإنه يزّين لك شرّها ، وأعلم أن الجبن والبخل والحرص غريزة يجمعها سوء الظن .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام العشرة}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “A man with a spacious house is a happy man.” [Reference: Al-Bihar Vol.73, p.152]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : من سعادة الرجل سعة منزله . {البحار ج73:ص152}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) quoted the Prophet (s.a.w) as saying: “ Among the things that make a man happy is a son who looks-or is- like him, a pretty and pious wife, a comfortable vehicle and a roomy house.” [Reference: Al-Bihar Vol.73, p.149]

عن الصادق (ع) قال : قال رسول الله (ص) : إن من سعادة المرء أن يشبهه ولده ، والمرأة الجملاء ذات دين ، والمركب الهني ، والمسكن الواسع . {البحار ج73 : ص149}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ Four and four: The good wife, the spacious house, the good neighbour and the graceful vehicle, fall under ‘happiness’. And the bad neighbour, the bad wife, the small house and the bad vehicle, fall under ‘hardship’.”

قال رسول الله (ص) : أربع من السعادة وأربع من الشقاوة ، فالأربع التي من السعادة : المرأة الصالحة ، والمسكن الواسع، والجار الصالح ، والمركب البهي ، والأربع التي من الشقاوة : الجار السوء ، والمرأة السوء ، والمسكن الضيق ، والمركب السوء .

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “Imam Áli -a.s-used to meditate in a house of his in which there was nothing but a bed, a sword and copy of the Koran.” [Reference: Al-Bihar Vol.76, p.161]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : كان لعلي (ع) بيت ليس فيه شيء إلا فراش وسيف ومصحف وكان يصلي فيه . {البحار ج76 :ص161 }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Áli-a.s- built a moderate size room within his house for his meditation; and when it was night time, he would take along a boy to spend the night with him and they would meditate in it.” [Reference: Al-Bihar Vol.76, p.61]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : كان علي (ع) قد جعل بيتا في داره ليس بالصغير ولا بالكبير لصلاته ، وكان إذا كان الليل ذهب معه بصبي ليبيت معه ، فيصلي فيه . {البحارج76:ص161 }

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ Fill your houses with light by reciting Koran; and do not make graves out of out of them as did the Jews and the Christians; they prayed in churches and synagogues and neglected their houses. For indeed, frequent reciting of Koran in a house would increase its blessings, enrich the household and make the house shine to the inhabitants of the highest heaven as the stars do to the inhabitants of earth.” [Reference: Al-Kafee, Vol.2, p. 610]

قال النبي (ص) نوروا بيوتكم بتلاوة القرآن ، ولاتتخذوها قبورا .. كمافعلت اليهود والنصارى ، صلّوا في الكنائس والبيع وعطّلوا بيوتهم ، فإن البيت إذا كثر فيه تلاوة القرآن كثر خيره ، وأتسع أهله ، وأضاء لأهل السماء كما تضيء نجوم السماء لأهل الدنيا . {الكافي ج2 : ص610 }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “A house inside of which is a Moslem reciting Koran would appear to the inhabitants of the highest heaven as the glittering star would to the inhabitants of earth.” [Reference: Al-Kafee, Vol.2, p. 610]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) أنه قال : إن البيت إذا كان فيه المرء المسلم يتلو القرآن يتراءاه أهل السماء كما يتراءى أهل الدنيا الكوكب الدري في السماء . {الكافي ج2 : ص610 }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “It is reprehensible (not recommendable) for a Moslem to keep a dog in his house.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) : يكره أن يكون في دار الرجل المسلم .. الكلب . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام الدواب }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ No one acquires a dog but (the reward of) his work will decrease by a carat a day.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : ما من أحد يتخذ كلبا إلا نقص في كل يوم من عمل صاحبه قيراط . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام الدواب }

Imam Áli (a.s) said: “There is no good in dogs, except hunting dogs and cattle dogs.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

عن أمير المؤمنين (ع) لاخير في الكلاب .. إلا كلب صيد ، أو كلب ماشية . {الوسائل من أبواب احكام الدواب }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Do not retain a hunting dog inside the house unless there is a door separating it from you.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : لاتمسك كلب الصيد في الدار إلا أن يكون بينك وبينه باب . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام الدواب }

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “Dogs are weak demons. So, when you are eating and a dog is present, you could either feed it or drive it a way because dogs have evil spirits.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

قال رسول الله (ص) : الكلاب من ضعفة الجن ، فإذا أكل أحدكم الطعام وشيء منها بين يديه فليطعمه أو ليطرده فإن لها أنفس سوء.{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام الدواب }

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ When you hear dogs barking or donkeys braying, then seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Satan (it s a bad omen) for they see what you can’t. Do what you are commanded to do!” [Al-Bihar, Vol.62. P.64]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إذا سمعتم نباح الكلاب ، ونهيق الحمير .. فتعوذوا بالله من الشيطان الرجيم ، فإنهم يرون ولاترون فافعلوا ما تؤمرون . {البحار ج62 ص64 }

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ (archangel) Gabriel came to me and said: ‘We, the company of Angels, do not go into a house that has in it a dog, a statue or a urinal.” [Al-Bihar, Vol.73, p.159]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إن جبرائيل أتاني فقال : إنا معشر الملائكة لاندخل بيتاً فيه كلب ، ولاتمثال جسد ، ولاإناء يبال فيه .{البحار ج73 :ص159 }

According to abu-Baseer: “I asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) about (the permissibility of having cushions and rugs with sculptured images on them? He said: “ There is no objection to having them in the house.” “Sculptured images!” I repeated. He said: “As long as they are walked over.” [Reference: Al-Kafee Vol.6, p.527]

عن أبي بصير ، عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : سألته عن الوسادة والبساط يكون فيه التماثيل فقال : لابأس به ، يكون في البيت ، قلت : التماثيل ؟ .. فقال : كل شيء يوطأ فلا بأس به . {الكافي ج6 :ص527 }

According to Áli bin-Jafer: “I asked Imam Áli (a.s) if it is permissible to meditate in a house or a room that has a statue in it? He said: “Do not meditate in it if the statues are facing you. If there is no other way, you can cut their heads off. Otherwise, do not meditate in it.” [Reference: Al-Kafee Vol.6, p.527]

عن علي بن جعفر ، عن أبي الحسن (ع) قال : سألته عن الدار والحجرة فيها التماثيل أيصلّى فيها ؟ .. فقال : لاتصلّ فيها وفيها شيء يستقبلك إلا أن لاتجد بداً فتقطع رؤوسها وإلا فلا تصلّ فيها . {الكافي ج6 : ص527 }

According to Mohammed bin-Moslem: “I asked Imam al-Sadiq -a.s- about (whether it is permissible to keep) the statues of trees, the sun and the moon.
He said: “ There is no objection to it; as long as there is no (statues of) animals within them.” [Reference: Al-Bihar, Vol.73, p.160]

عن محمد بن مسلم قال : سألت أبا عبد الله (ع) عن تماثيل الشجر والشمس والقمر قال : لابأس مالم يكن فيه شيء من الحيوان. {البحار ج73 :ص160}

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ Take on poultry in your houses: they distract Satan from your young ones.” [Reference: Al-Bihar, Vol.73, p.163]

قال رسول الله (ص) : إتخذوا في بيوتكم الدواجن يتشاغل بها الشيطان عن صبيانكم .{البحار ج73 : ص163 }

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Doves are among the prophets’ birds.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

عن الصادق (ع) قال : الحمام في طيور الأنبياء .{الوسائل من أبواب أحكام الدواب}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ The origin of the Kabah’s Holy Mosque doves is a remainder of the doves that belonged to Ishmael son of Abraham (a.s, both) which he took on for amusement.” [Al-Wasaíl, from the book of guidelines of treating animals]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : إن أهل حمام الحرم بقية حمام كانت لاسماعيل بن إبراهيم (ع) اتخذها كان يأنس بها . {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام الدواب}

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) said: “ Indeed! The presence of doves in a house protects inhabitants against maladies caused by demons: the foolish demons that live in the house would play with the doves and leave people alone.” [Reference Al-Wasaíl, Vol.8, p.377]

عن أبي عبد الله (ع) قال : ليس من بيت فيه حمام إلا لم يصب أهل ذلك البيت آفة من الجن .. إن سفهاء الجن يعيشون في البيت فيعبثون بالحمام ويدعون الإنسان .{الوسائل ج8 : ص377}

I (anonymous) mentioned doves at Imam al-Sadiq’s (a.s). His comment was: “Take them on in your houses for they are lovable; Prophet Noah’s -a.s- prayer affected them. Moreover, they are the most amusing things in a house.” [Reference Al-Wasaíl, Vol.8, p.378]

ذكرت الحمام عند أبي عبد الله (ع) فقال : اتخذوها في منازلكم .. فإنها محبوبة لحقتها دعوة نوح (ع) .. وهي آنس شيء في البيوت . {الوسائل ج8 : ص378}

Imam Áli (a.s) said: “ The rooster has five qualities which it shares with prophets: Liberality, contentment, knowledge of prayer hours, frequent intimate association and jealousy (of honour).” [Reference Al-Wasaíl, Vol.8, p.383]

عن أبي الحسن (ع) قال : في الديك خمس خصال من خصال الأنبياء : السخاء ، والقناعة ، والمعرفة بأوقات الصلاة ، وكثرة الطروقة ، والغيرة . {الوسائل ج8 : ص383 }

The Prophet (s.a.w) said: “ Do not curse the rooster: His crying is for waking up people for prayer.” [Reference: guidelines of prayer hours]

عن رسول الله (ص) قال : لاتسبوا الديك لأن صياحه إنما هو لأجل إيقاظ الناس للصلاة. {الوسائل من أبواب أحكام المواقيت }

Scientific Principles for Raising Teenagers

The problem of raising teenagers is one of the problems that concern the specialists in this field. Sons usually stay under their parents control till a certain age, but the parents often misuse this control. The parents later regret it after their sons leave their control whether by marriage, migration or study. So it’s very important for these parents to give this subject plenty of time and attention, knowing that a righteous son would be like an everlasting charity which would benefit them after death!

ان مشكلة تربية المراهقين من المشاكل التي تؤرق الكثيرين من المهتمين بامور التربية .. حيث أن الأولاد يبقون حتى سن معينة ، تحت قبضة الوالدين ، لكنهما كثيرا ما يسيئان استثمار هذه السيطرة ، ليندما بعد خروج الولد عن دائرة قبضتهما ، زواجا ً ، أو هجرة ، او دراسة .. فكم من الحري بهما أن يعطيا للموضوع حقه من التفكير و الوقت.. اذ من المعلوم ان الولد الصالح من مصاديق الصدقة الجارية التي تنفعهما بعد الموت !

Man has a bodily structure and a psychological structure. Just as there is a moving body, there is a growing sprit. So when we pay attention to the bodily growth of our sons, we have to pay attention to their spirits and their growth. This growth reaches its peak, integration, or low point in the age of adolescence.

إن للانسان تكوين بدني وتكوين نفسي .. فكما أن هناك جسما ً يتحرك فهناك روح تنمو.. ولهذا فانه في الوقت الذي نهتم فيه بالنمو الجسمي لأولادنا ، فانه يتحتم علينا أن نهتم بأرواحهم ونموها ، هذا النمو الذي يبلغ أوج فورانه – تكاملا ً أو تسافلا ً- في مرحلة المراهقة.

There are factors that influence the growing teenager and his behavior. Some of them are internal factors like hereditary characteristics and mental structure. Obviously while these factors vary from one member of a family to another, that doesn’t imply fatalism in determining human behavior. Other factors are environmental factors like parents’ or corrupt relatives’ behavior, friends, scholastic environment, and finally different media that have often become devilish tools to corrupt our sons.

ان هناك عناصر مؤثرة في تربية المراهق وسلوكه .. فمنها ما هو ذاتي : كالصفات الوراثية ، والبنية النفسية والعقلية ، و من الواضح ان هذه الخصوصيات – رغم تميزها من فرد عن أخر حتى ضمن الأسرة الواحدة- لا تعني أبدا ً حالة من ( الجبر) في تحديد سلوك الأنسان .. ومنها ما هو محيطي : كسلوك الآباء ، والأقارب المنحرفين ، والأصدقاء ، والجو المدرسي ، وأخيراً وسائل الإعلام المختلفة التي كثيراً ما أصبحت من الأدوات الشيطانية المسببة لانحراف أبنائنا.

We notice in many cases that internal factors for sons are healthy and perfect, but unfortunately parents’ behavior within the family; disputes and conflicts, disobeying religious rules, or neglecting their sons and being preoccupied with their own affairs, all of that would produce different defects in the sons’ behavior. In this case, parents are the ones to be held responsible in the Hereafter.

اننا نلاحظ فى حالات كثيرة سلامة التكوين الذاتي لدى الأبناء وعدم وجود خلل فيه .. و لكن – مع الاسف – نرى ان سلوك الأبوين داخل الأسرة : من حيث وجود خلاف أو نزاع بينهما، أو عدم التزامهما بتعاليم الشريعة ، أو إهمال الأولاد داخل المنزل والانشغال عنهم بشؤونهم الخاصة ، هو الذي يؤدي إلى نشوء أنواع من الخلل في سلوكهم الجوارحى والجوانحى ، وبذلك يكونان في هذه الحالة ، هما المؤاخذان اللذان يتحملان المسؤولية يوم القيامة .

Some parents, as we can see, do not know who their sons’ friends are, and what orientations and inclinations they have when in fact they are the ones who outline their sons’ behavior. We have often seen parents giving all their efforts, psychological and intellectual, to raise their son on good manners till the age of eighteen. But one red night, one trip to suspicious places, or one corrupt company turns this son upside down, and what a great loss! For this reason it is necessary to start strict and full monitoring over the sons, as long as this can keep them from evils, by watching whom they accompany, where they go and what they do.

نلاحظ أن بعض الآباء لا يعرفون من هم أصدقاء أبنائهم، وما هي توجهاتهم وميولهم ، والحال أن هؤلاء هم الذين يرسمون سلوك الأبناء من حيث لا يشعرون ! .. ولطالما رأينا ان الأهل يبذلون أقصى الجهود- نفسيا ً وفكريا ً- لتربية ولدهم تربية صالحة حتى سن الثامنة عشرة ، و لكن ليلة من الليالى الحمراء ، أو سفرة إلي الأماكن المشبوهة، أو معاشرة منحرفة واحدة ، تجعله ينقلب رأسا ً على عقب ، ويا لها من خسارة كبرى!.. ولذا لا بد من مراقبة الأولاد مراقبة دقيقة وكاملة ما دام في ذلك صيانة لهم عن المفاسد، بمراقبة من يعاشرون، وأين يذهبون، واستخدام الفخاخ التربوية المناسبة في هذا المجال.

One of the environmental influences on the teenager behavior is the scholastic environment. As we can see the school nowadays form a large part of the youths’ life. Yet it is regrettable to see some parents, for financial reasons, local nearness or the like, choosing corrupt schools, or schools known to have improper breeding environments for their sons. In reality, financial spending in this matter is an assured investment, and it’s much more beneficial than spending money on life’s luxuries.

من المؤثرات المحيطية على سلوك المراهقين هو الجو المدرسي .. فمن الملاحظ أن المدرسة في هذه الأيام ترسم مساحة كبيرة من حياة الشاب.. ومع هذا فان من المؤسف أن بعض الأباء – من أجل التوفير المادي ، أو القرب المكانى ، او ما شابه ذلك – يختارون مدرسة منحرفة، أو معروفة بالأجواء التربوية غير السليمة أو المختلطة ، لتكون منبتا ً لأبنائهم.. والحال أن الأنفاق المادي في هذا المجال هو استثمار مضمون النتائج.. وهو أجدى بكثير من الأنفاق على كماليات الحياة !!.

One practical recommendation in this matter is constructive dialogue. Youth nowadays have wide knowledge and awareness, and good analytical abilities in politics, economy, culture, and so forth. When the social sphere is full of imported thoughts, cultural corruptions and mercurial concepts that can be missed, it’s our duty to help the youth who live in a kind of intellectual confusion, output of this intellectual freedom, primarily by open minded discussion, instead of clashing or cursing with corruption and unbelief. This latter method would lead them to stubbornness and insisting on their attitudes, even just as a challenge. The holy hadeeth had stated something close to this: “Never raise your sons the way you were raised, because they were created for a different time than yours”.

من التوصيات العملية لتربية المراهقين هي الحوارية الهادفة، حيث نلاحظ أن الشباب في هذا العصر يملكون إطلاعا ً واسعا ، ً وقدرة تحليلية في عالم السياسة والاقتصاد والثقافة ، وبما أن الساحة مليئة بالأفكار المستوردة ، والانحرافات الثقافية ، والمفاهيم الزئبقية التى يساء الاستفادة منها ، فان من اللزام علينا أن نأخذ بيد الشباب الذين يعيشون شيئا من الحيرة الفكرية التى هى من افرازات الحرية الفكرية !!.. ولا يتم ذلك الا بالنقاش مع صدر واسع ، بدلا من المواجهة والاتهام بالانحراف أو الكفر، فان ذلك من موجبات العناد والتمسك بتلك المفاهيم ولو من باب التحدى والاغاظة !!. وقد جاء بما يقرب من هذا المضمون الشريف : ( أدبوا أولادكم بغير أدبكم .. فأنهم خلقوا لزمان غير زمانكم ).

Another practical recommendation for the parents is to establish a friendship with their sons and avoid the roughness that is widespread in eastern societies. This friendship would encourage the son to discuss his problems and concern with his parents, the ones who know what is good for him, instead of strangers. The father should himself select the most suitable group of friends for his son like those who come frequently to the mosque, before the son would choose bad ones.

ومن التوصيات العملية للآباء : إنشاء حالة من الصداقة مع الولد، والابتعاد عما هو سائد في مجتمعات الشرق من أسلوب ( العصا والخيزران )!.. ان من شان هذه الصداقة ان تجعل الولد يشكو همومه إلى والديه – وهما الأعرف بما يصلحه – بدلا من الالتجاء إلى الغرباء ! .. كما أن على الأب أن يختار بنفسه المجموعة السليمة من الأصدقاء كشباب المساجد مثلا ، قبل أن يختار هو بنفسه بطانة السوء .

Another important recommendation for the parents is to show their love, affection and satisfaction with their sons, and keep away from accusation and mistrust which will make them lose their self-confidence. The father who notices any good sign of this son should take advantage of this chance and try to encourage him, praise him and reward him. It is well known that reward is a motivator even for adults, a fact that is considered also in urging recommendable actions by the Divine Law.

ومن التوصيات المهمة للآباء : هو إظهار حبهم و مشاعرهم و رضاهم للأبناء ، و الابتعاد عن الاتهام و سوء الظن !.. حيث يلاحظ أن الولد عندما يرى نفسه متهماً في المنزل ، فإنه سيفقد الثقة بنفسه ، و من هنا ينبغي على الاب الذى يرى من ولده بادرة حسنة ، أن يستثمر الفرصة و يشجعه و يمتدحه معبرا عن ذلك بفرحة وجائزة .. ومن المعلوم أن عامل الاجرو الثواب من الأمور المشجعة حتى للبالغين ، وهو ما نلاحظه أيضا في مجال الحث على المستحبات من قبل الشريعة السمحة.

If Moses and Haroon (S) were ordered by Almighty God to speak with soft words to the Pharaoh, we should certainly speak to our sons, while they are our subjects, our satisfaction and our everlasting charity, with soft words! Isn’t that fulfilling what the Almighty called for in His saying: {Call unto the way of thy Lord with wisdom and fair exhortation, and reason with them in the better way} and {There is no compulsion in religion}. So let us ask Almighty God for help, and pray to him saying {Our Lord! Vouchsafe us comfort of our wives and of our offspring}, so that the Prophet (S) can be proud of such offspring in front of other nations in the Hereafter.

إذا كان الأمر الإلهي لموسى و هارون (ع) أن يقولا لفرعون قولاً ليناً.. أليس من الأولى أن يكون قولنا لأولادنا – و هم رعيتنا و قرة أعيننا و صدقتنا الجارية – من مصاديق اللين من القول ؟! .. أليس في ذلك امتثال لقوله تعالى : { ادع إلى سبيل ربك بالحكمة والموعظة الحسنة} و{ لا إكراه في الدين } ؟! .. ولنطلب العون من الله تعالى، و ندعوه قائلين : { ربنا هب لنا من أزواجنا وذرياتنا قرة أعين واجعلنا للمتقين إماما} ، ليباهي الرسول (ص) بمثل هذه الذرية ، فى قبال الأمم الاخرى يوم القيامة.

Things aren’t always what they seem

Life’s Little Lessons

Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion’s guest room. Instead the angels were given a space in the cold basement. As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied.. “Things aren’t always what they seem”.

The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night’s rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.

The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel “how could you have let this happen!? The first man had everything, yet you helped him,” she accused. “The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let their cow die.”

“Things aren’t always what they seem,” the older angel replied. “When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn’t find it. Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave her the cow instead. Things aren’t always what they seem.”

Sometimes this is exactly what happens when things don’t turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every outcome is always to your advantage. You might not know it until some time later.

Think about the following:

Should you find it hard to get to sleep tonight; Just remember the homeless family who has no bed to lie in.

Should you find yourself stuck in traffic; don’t despair. There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard of privilege.

Should you have a bad day at work; think of the man who has been out of work for the last three months.

Should you despair over a relationship gone bad; Think of the person who has never known what it’s like to love and be loved in return.

Should you grieve the passing of another weekend; Think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week, for $15.00 to feed her family.

Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance; Think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.

Should you notice a new gray hair in the mirror; Think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.

Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking “what is my purpose”; Be thankful, there are those who didn’t live long enough to get the opportunity.

Should you find yourself the victim of other people’s bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities; Remember, things could be worse. You could be them!!!

Should you decide to send this to a friend; You might brighten someone’s day!

Turn your face to the sun and the shadows will fall behind you

THE CHARACTER OF STUDENT

THE CHARACTER OF STUDENT IN THE TRADITIONS OF THE AHLULBAYT (as)

Imam Sadiq (as) said, “Your teacher has the right over you that you should honor him and pay him respect in different assemblies. You should be very attentive to his words. you should not raise your voice above his. if anybody asks him a question, you should not give its reply. You should not converse with others in his presence and you should allow the people to benefit from his knowledge. You should not speak ill of anyone before him. If anybody speaks ill of him in your presence, you should defend him. You should conceal his shortcomings and bring his virtues to light. You should not associate with his enemies and should not dispute with his friends. If you act on these lines the angels of Allah will testify that you have paid attention to him and have acquired knowledge for the sake of Allah and not to attract the attention of the people. And the right of your pupils on you is that you should realize that in granting you knowledge and opening its path to you, Allah has appointed you to be their guardian. In case, therefore, you teach them properly and do not frighten them and are not furious with them, Allah will, through His kindness, increase your knowledge. But if you drive the people away from knowledge and, as and when they approach you for it, you frighten them and get annoyed with them, it will only be appropriate that the Almighty Allah may take away the light of knowledge from you and may degrade you in the eyes of the people.” The Messenger of God said:”A loving glance at the face of a learned [`alim] is an act of worship [ibada].” He also said: “Sitting with the people of learning is an honor in this life and the hereafter.” On the authority of Abu ‘Abd Allah, it is reported that the Messenger of God said: “A man will come on the day of resurrection. To his credit will be so many good deeds that they will be heaps, or towering mountains. He will ask: ‘O my Lord! All this for me-and what have I done for them?’ God will say: ‘This is the knowledge you taught to people, and they kept on acting on it after you.” Abu Ja’far said,”Whoever taught the path to guidance will have as much reward as those who acted upon it, without in any way decreasing the reward of the latter. Whoever taught the path to wrongdoing will have as much punishment as those who acted upon such teachings without in any way decreasing the punishment of the latter.”

THE CHARACTER OF STUDENT IN THE TRADITIONS OF THE AHLULBAYT (as)

The HOLY PROPHET of Islam peace be upon him said :“Be alert surely Allah loves those who seek knowledge.”(Behar ul Anvar v : 1; p : 172, Alkafi v : 1)

“Any thing even fish in sea ask pardon for those who obtain knowledge.”Behar ul anvar v : 1 ; p : 171

“One of the best alms is learning knowledge then teaching to his brother.”Mohajjat ul baiza v : 1 ; p : 22

“Whoever goes out of his house to learn a branch of knowledge for doing then for teaching, ALLAH rewards him for each his step ALLAH’S reward of thousand year fasts and saying prayers.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 ; P : 166

“I swear by Allah that any one to and from to learn knowledge, Allah rewards him for any his step reward of worship on one year and makes a city to him in paradise.”Behar ul Anvar V : 1 ; P : 184

“ Keep knowledge with writing.”Behar ul anvar V : 77,61 ; P : 141,124

“ Whoever obtains knowledge is like who fasts everyday and says prayer night long.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 ; P : 184

“Angels love to become friend with them (knowledge seekers) and cares them with their wings.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 ; P : 166

“One step will be between whoever dies obtaining knowledge to revive Islam and prophets in paradise.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 ; P : 184

“O ABAZAR whoever goes out of his house to obtain a branch of knowledge, God gives him a city in paradise for listening or writing each letter.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 178

“Allah, Angels and prophets love those who search knowledge and any one except lucky doesn’t like knowledge, then good for knowledge seeker on doomsday.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 178

“Whoever loves to look at delivered man from hell by ALLAH, should look at those who search knowledge.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 184, Mohajjat ul baiza V : 1 P : 18

“If knowledge is suspended from pleiad, surely some of Iranians get it.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 195

IMAM ALI peace be upon him said:“Virtuous men in it (world) are people of virtue and they listen carefully to useful knowledge.”Nahj ul Balagha, sermon: 193

“O’ people! Know certainly accomplishment of religion is obtaining knowledge and doing accordingly.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 175

“Whoever travels to obtain knowledge is like who strive hard in ALLAH’S way.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 179

“O young nation; keep your honour by being polite and your religion by knowledge.”“Knowledge is more than what you can learn all of that, then learn the best one.”Ghorar ul Hekam

“Whoever doesn’t listen to Wiseman, his wisdom will die.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 P : 53

“The best one to be learned by teenagers is what they will need when become old.”Nahjol Balagha of ibne abal hadid V : 20 P : 333 “817 word”

“Obtaining knowledge on young hood is like to engrave on stone.”Safynat ul behar P : 680

“Student should be polite about gaining knowledge and should be tireless on learning and never imagine that his knowledge is much.”Ghurar ul Hekam.

“O believer surely this knowledge and courtesy are your price the try to learn them.If your knowledge and courtesy become much, your price will be high. Then you are led to your lord by knowledge and you can serve your lord with courtesy very well.”Behar ul anvar V : 1 ; P : 180

“Whoever doesn’t obtain knowledge on childhood will not be vanguard on old hood.”Ghorar ul hekam P:697

“More studying and thinking about knowledge, opens wisdom.”Behar ul anvar V:1 ; P:52

IMAM HASSAN MOJTABA peace be upon him invited his children and brothers then said :“Surely you are child now and soon will be old then seek knowledge, and whoever can not memorize it, should write and keep it in his house.”Mounyat ul moried P : 196

IMAM SAJJAD peace be upon him said:“If people know what is in knowledge, certainly will obtain it though with bloodshed and going to deep sea.”Behar ul anvar V:1 ; P:185

IMAM SAJJAD peace be upon him about teacher’s right said:“Students should:

1) Respect his/her teacher and his/her session. 2) Be eager to meet him/her. 3) Listen to him/her carefully. 4) Speak to him/her politely. 5) Not answer questions unless he/she is asked to. 6) Not talk and backbite any one before him.7) Conceal his/her faults.8) Express his/her goodness. 9) Not meet with who are against him/her.10) Behave well with his/her friends.If student observes the above statements, angels will certify that he/she learns his/her knowledge for sake of ALLAH not people.” Vasael ashiah V:11 P: 134, Behar ul anvar V:2 P: 42, Tohaf ul Uqool.

IMAM SADIQ peace be upon him said:“Keep your books well since you need them soon.”Behar ul anvar V:2 P:152

“Write knowledge since you can’t memorize unless with writing. Heart confides to written.”Alkafi V: 1, Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 202

“Whoever obtains knowledge and acts accordingly then teaches for sake of ALLAH, is called in heavens in to the skies honorably.”Alkafi V: 1 P: 35, Behar ul anvar V: 2 P: 27

IMAM MOSA ALKAZEM peace be upon him said:“Conversation with learned men on dunghill is better then conversation with ignorant leaning on pillow on carpet.”Alkafi V; 1 P: 39

IMAM REZA peace be upon him said:“Knowledge is treasure and it’s keys are question.”Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 198

IMAM MAHDI peace be upon him prayed for students:“O GOD please do students a favour and grace them to study with pleasure and effort.”

The HOLY PROPHET of Islam peace be upon him said:“Sleeping with knowledge is better than saying prayer with ignorance.”Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 185

“Those who gain knowledge among ignorant men are who live among dead men.”Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 181

“Those who obtain knowledge won’t die even enjoy his/her effort as much as they try.”Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 177

“Obtaining knowledge is obligatory for any muslem.”Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 177

“Bravo to those who seek knowledge; surely angels embrace them with their wings.”Behar ul anvar V: 1 P: 185

IMAM SADIQ peace be upon him said:“Behave humbly with your teacher.”Alkafi V: 1 P: 36

IMAM ALI peace be upon him said:“More thinking about what is learned make it constant and make man learn new theme.”Ghorar ul hekam V: 2 P: 695

Dua Before Studying 

“Allahumma infa’nii bimaa ‘allamtanii wa’allimnii maa yanfa’uunii. Allahumma inii as’aluka fahmal-nabiyyen wa hifzal mursaleen al-muqarrabeen. Allahumma ijal leesanee ‘aiman bi dhikrika wa qalbi bi khashyatika. Innaka ‘ala ma-tasha’u qadeer wa anta hasbun-allahu wa na’mal wakeel.”

“Oh Allah! Make useful for me what you have taught me and teach me knowledge that will be useful to me. Oh Allah! I ask you for the understanding of the prophets and the memory of the messengers, and those nearest to you. Oh Allah! Make my tongue full of your remembrance and my heart with consciousness of you. Oh Allah! You do whatever you wish, and you are my availer and protector and best of aid.”

 Dua After Studying 

“Allahumma inni astaodeeka ma qara’tu wama hafaz-tu. Farudduhu ‘allaya inda hajati elahi. Innaka ‘ala ma-tasha’-u qadeer wa anta hasbeeya wa na’mal wakeel” 

“Oh Allah! I entrust you with what I have read and I have studied. Oh Allah! Bring it back to me when I am in need of it. Oh Allah! You do whatever you wish, you are my availer and protector and the best of aid.”

 

 Dua While Studying Something

Difficult

“Allahumma la sahla illama ja-‘altahu sahla anta taj ‘alu al hazana eza ma shi’ta sahal.”

“Oh Allah! Nothing is easy except what you have made easy. If you wish, you can make the difficult easy.”

 Dua For Concentration 

Salla-l-laahu alaa Muhammad wa aal-e Muhammad. Allahumma inni as’aluka yaa mudhakkira-l khayr wa faa’ilahu wa-l-aamimira bihi dhakir-ni maa ansaani-hi-shaytan.”

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